Layout Changer Strikes Again
October 3rd, 2008 
Chip, Internet, School Preparations 
2 replies
Hide your websites or it’ll get you too!
Haha, nah, but I did change the theme around a bit. I like it better this way, even if it does have several subtle kinks in Internet Explorer 6 that I just can’t figure out. Any critiques? I’ll try to fix the Internet Explorer stuff later, but really, it’s passable and decent at least for the moment.
In other news, I have a job interview on Monday at an art store. It will be the first job interview I will ever have ever. Hopefully more interviews will be arranged with other stores I applied to soon, but really, if the art place offered me the job I would so take it. If anything, I’m a bit nervous because I’m not exactly sure what to expect, but it shouldn’t be so bad.
The SAT is tomorrow, so everything I have been studying for in the past month will come down to the fateful, dreadfully early hour at which it begins. Seriously, getting up at ten is a feat for me. Six o’clock in the morning is going to kill me, but I shall combat it with green eggs and ham.
Lastly, I just want to poke anyone who owns or has owned a guinea pig, because mine is having some serious problems. He drags his legs, which we are sure is not due to Vitamin C deficiency because there is a wide variety of food in his diet. He’s also chewing on his feet to the point where there’s a bone sticking out where one of his toes should be. We took him to the vet and he doesn’t have any broken bones or fractures; all they could do was give us some anti-inflammatory medicine. What is this pig’s problem?
I’m Going Home!
August 19th, 2008 Chip 2 replies
Now that my floor is less cluttered, I’ve taken to putting Chip on the floor so he can have some free range time. He never really gets to walk around that much, and it’s absolutely adorable to watch him waddle around because his chunky backside shakes when he walks and he barely has any actual leg attached to his feet.
I don’t close his cage door when I take him out because he struggles when he’s in the air and his toes are incredibly sharp, which equals a stab fest on my arms. That, and I just don’t really care enough about that tiny detail. 
Apparently Chip does, however, because last night (and today) I watched him wander right off the pad, sniff around, waddle straight over to his cage and jump in. Yes, he jumped in. Never mind that the cage door is two inches off the ground and guinea pigs have poor backs, but somehow he managed it. And he did it a couple times today too, which became rather annoying when I was trying to get him to eat some food that I laid out for him. Apparently he likes standing around in his own poop more.
All I know is, he’s cleverer than I gave him credit for. What else has he kept from me?!
You’re No Match For Me, Spongebob
April 26th, 2008 Chip 4 replies
Mom and I went shopping today. Among our spoils was a harness that we got for the guinea pig so I could take him outside and not run frantically around the yard after him whenever he decides to take off. When we got home I was excited to put the harness on him and take him out.
His activities were predictable, all he did was eat clovers. And I had the most perfect entry in mind while watching him do it. I imagined myself finding a shamrock with four leaves, picking it and showing it to him and then watching him devour my good luck charm to prove that I never had any in the first place.
That didn’t happen. Something else did. I don’t know how, but… I was watching him eat and I was laughing. He started to run, I was still laughing. The harness was suddenly gone, he was still running, and I was running after him shouting “HEY!” I managed to grab him before he got away, but his retrieval is not the big issue.
Guys…
I think Chip may be the reincarnation of Harry Houdini. o_o
The title of this entry is dedicated to my poor driving skills. Yeah, mom let me drive (I only have a permit) on the way home, and I nearly ran us into a street sign. Managed to block up the entire road while doing it too, though thankfully it’s a road less traveled. I hate driving, but I’ll leave that ramble for a day when nothing interesting is happening.
You Know You’re Odd When…
April 25th, 2008 Chip, Fun 6 replies
- It’s in the middle of the night, pitch black, and the first thought you have when you can’t find your glasses is “the ghosts must’ve taken them.” Meanwhile their actual whereabouts happens to be on the floor among piles of drawings and scraps.
- You squeal upon realizing that The Discovery Channel has two full hours of giant squid documentaries and proceed to take comprehensive notes on them.
There are more, but this is the most pressing evidence at the moment.
And here is your complimentary drawing of a ghost wearing glasses and a plaid giant squid. Enjoy. 
Edited to Add: To add to this segment, you know your guinea pig is odd when the only way to shut him up besides throwing carrots at him is to hold him in front a television and force him to watch stand up comedy with you. When I mentioned this to my mother her reply was something along the lines of, “Don’t you think that maybe he got quiet because he liked to be touched?”
“No, I think he was just amused at the squirrel jokes.”
Why I Loathe Guinea Pigs
April 19th, 2008 Chip No replies
Lately the spring weather here in New York has gotten me into the mood to go outside more, and today I thought it would be an especially nice treat to take Chip, my guinea pig, out there with me. The little fellow spends most of his time cowering in the corner of his cage in my stuffy bedroom, so of course it seemed like an upgrade. We have a deck with a fenced in area for our dogs to run around in, and while it did cross my mind that Chip might pull a fast one on me and pull himself through it, I gave him the benefit of the doubt. I grabbed the guinea pig and sat him right in the middle of the yard, where he proceeded to do nothing but sit there, much to my surprise.
Surprise because he eats everything that comes within a foot of the bucktoothed abyss that is Chip’s mouth, and the grass out in the yard is pretty tall. But this time he just sat there, basking in the sun, probably wondering what the hell was going on, where his food dish was. I asked mom for a towel so I could sit next to him and pet him, since I was wearing a nice skirt and I am girly in that I don’t like getting dirt on my nice clothes. While I waited for the towel (didn’t think to get one until I was out there), Dad warned me to watch him carefully because Chip is small enough to fit through the fence that leads underneath the deck. “Obviously,” I said.
Yeah. Obviously. The little shit defiantly took off right through the fence and underneath the deck as soon as I threw the towel down next to him. Mom supplied me with two baby carrots and left me there to try and tempt the devil’s incarnate to come closer. A lot of jumping over the deck’s rails onto rocks without anything on my bare feet and sticking my arm through the fence while yelling obscenities and “Chippy Chippy Chip!” ensued for, oh, forty minutes. Because, you know. Nice warm sunny spring day and I have nothing better to do than monitor the whereabouts of a traitorous rat, and mom would never forgive me if I let something happen to him, despite how obviously evil and out to get me he is. If you don’t believe me, look for yourself:
Evil, I say. We finally managed to capture him and safely escort him back to his cage. I think it will be awhile before I let him see the light of day again, if ever.
Contact Me
Back to the top
Powered by Wordpress